Death is always a surprise even though it’s always the toy prize at the end of life. It’s nearly unbearable. Only the perfect love that casts out fear makes it to go on living with such so much loss. Of course we neither love nor accept love perfectly, but love is perfect and makes it possible to live in the shadow of death.
My life is evidence of what perfect love does for us, of how God cares for us in the particulars of our lives even when those particulars are horrid. But it’s hard to express. When I feared I’d mourn forever, God surprised me again and again. He has more surprises than I ever imagined. Eventually, I even encountered the surprise of discovering that I don’t want to go back to the far off halcyon days for which I longed. I’m happy and so, so grateful to live without rancour because of all that I lost.
So please pray for me as I struggle to complete my rewrite, as I struggle to give voice to joy.
On Friday (and occasionally Saturday if Friday is filled with an excess of other activities),100s of bloggers set a timer, write for 5 minutes, and then post the results over at Kate Motaung’s blog, Heading Home. She provides the prompt on Thursday evening. We don’t edit or concern ourselves with whether our writing is flawless or worthy to be seen. We expose our incomplete, unpolished thoughts and words to each other and our readers and tweet them with the hashtag #FMFParty. Join us.