Five Minute Friday: Long Wait For Family

I have been alone for so long. Alone, but not alone. My Friend has always been with me. But there has long been a dearth of people. I have done without what most take for granted: a friendly face waiting while I undergo medical tests, a ride home after anesthesia, friends who discuss plans and offer guidance, family to share meals – simple things, things most never even think about. The weight of doing it on my own is heavy.

And now, an opportunity for family has been presented. It might work out. It might not. But the hope that the long, endless hunger for people who want to be involved in my life, who want me to be involved in theirs stymies me. Can I do it? Can I accept that there are people who love me that much though I don’t deserve it, have no claim on their love, could never even request it? Can I accept such a gift?

I don’t know. The possibility is heart breaking, in the best possible way. So we pray and converse and discern. God does set the solitary in families. Maybe after such a long wait for family, He has prepared me to accept one.

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Every Friday,100s of bloggers set a timer, write for 5 minutes, and then publish the results. We don’t edit or engulf ourselves in concerns about whether our writing is worthy to be seen. We expose our incomplete, unpolished thoughts and words to each other and our readers. Our new home is at Kate Motaung’s blog, Heading Home. She provides a prompt on Thursday evening and we all link our posts there and tweet them with the hashtag #FMFParty. Join us.

Comments

  1. Drusilla, in just those few paragraphs, I feel my heart aching with your pain. What a gift is family. Some people are stuck with one they wish would go away. Others long for adoption. I sincerely hope and pray that this possibility you mention comes to be, and that you find a tribe surrounding you with a firm and solid embrace.

Tell me what you think. Thanks.

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